This happened to me today, and now I'm freaking out for no reason, even though nothing happened. The scene has been in replay mode in my mind ever since it happened. Seriously, this is freaky, but maybe it's just me.
I really wonder if I wasn't the only one doing it. For all I know, I could be right, judging from past experiences. Do you see how we're now back to square one?Let I be firstly myself. Let all the other self, including me, myself and I be the constant unknown.
Frankly, I think I'm angry at myself. I am angry at how I can't control how I feel. I'm angry with me now that I see how weak I am. I can't believe how much of a loser I am. I keep on saying that I haven't change a bit, but at the same time I go around telling people that the only constant is change. How ironic! - I hate doing that. What I am trying to prove? I hate it how I always pretend not to be bothered, but when I'm alone, I start cursing and swearing like it was nobody's business. I don't see why I can't just snap out of this new, stupid me and I don't understand my brain anymore. Is it still functioning, or has it really died on me? I can't take the way I act like I am a happy-go-lucky girl living in a wonderful world. I am pissed off at myself for being so childish and immature. And I think I can really slap myself hard enough one day, because I can no longer look at my reflection. I am laughing out loud one minute, and then the next, I can have a bitch-fit. I want to run away, like really disappear. I want to get a life, because right now, I either don't have one, or that one I think I have just sucks so much that I'm over trying to make it anything right. I want to be a quitter and stop myself from keeping too much grudges. Revenge is like a poison, but right now it's water to me. I've never been so angsty, and I think I'm about to do things I will regret and hate myself even more than I already do now. And the last thing I'd say, if I'm kind enough, would be the word you hate oh-so-much.p.s. No, I'm not having PMS.
p.s.s. Who says I having issues about me?
(enter my name here)
Labels: and who am i?
